Dear Mistress: Nipple Lover, Cocky, Empowered

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Dear Mistress: Nipple Lover, Cocky, Empowered

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Dear Mistress,

My husband likes to have his nipples played with, pinched, and teased during sex. Sometimes I can’t give him the constant pressure or sensation he craves. What nipple clamps or other accessories would you recommend for us?

Lavinia Countess Spencer - A Pinch of SnuffDear Nipple Lover,

Women tend to forget that some men enjoy having their nipples stimulated. Paying constant attention to them can be difficult when there are other activities taking place. Fear not, my new friend. There are numerous fun products on the market that will get the job done for you. The size of men’s nipples can be a challenge, so my first suggestion would be tweezer clamps. They have small tips with rubber ends – perfect for a man. They are adjustable and can be connected to a chain, which is pretty fun to tug. Get ready for him to moan and leap off of the bed. If you don’t have tweezer clamps handy, try the old standard…CLOTHESPINS.

Nippletastic Toys:

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Dear Mistress,

I’ve been on the hunt for something to help my boyfriend stay harder longer. It seems I take a bit longer than him to reach that magical place. Could you please give us some recommendations?

Dear Cocky,

A cock ring is a great place to start. They slow down the blood flow out of the penis, allowing the man to stay erect for a longer period of time. Some men even report having increased sensitivity and the strongest orgasms with the aid of a ring. Obviously there are several styles to choose from: soft and stretchy styles for beginners so you can the hang of it (pun intended), vibrating styles to add a little zing, to solid styles for the advanced cock ringer.

C-Ring TantusI would suggest starting with a stretchy style that can either be placed behind the balls and on top of his cock or simply around the shaft. You will need to follow the instructions on how to properly measure his member. Oh, and be careful with pulling his pubes. OUCH! Unless you’re into that – go for it.

Take a look at these styles. Keep in mind that your guy may need to try a few different styles to find the one that he likes best. Added bonus: Watching him put it on may speed things up for you. Take it all in, sweetheart.

Cock rings! Get your cock rings here!

Helpful Instructions:

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Dear Mistress,

Let’s discuss pegging. At my husband’s request, we are exploring pegging. We began playing back there a year ago. At first, it was all external, then it was a finger, then I bought a toy specifically to stimulate his prostate. It has been amazing and has providing some of the most intense orgasms for him. Now, he wants pegging. He is typically dominant, so for me to take on this role is outside of my comfort zone. I want to do this for him because he has always been willing to give me what I need. Any suggestions on what I should buy? Also how I can mentally prepare to switch into what I consider a more dominant role than I am use to?

Dear Empowered,

Say please. We will discuss pegging because I want to discuss it.

The topic is so taboo. It frustrates me that some men find it so emasculating; when in reality it will probably give them the highest amount of sexual satisfaction they have ever known. Men are afraid of it for some reason. So kudos to your husband for being so confident and in touch with his sexuality. That speaks volumes.

Sumerian - Dedication Nail - Walters 481457 - View AAs for him normally being the dominant one, fear not. You do not need to necessarily take on a more aggressive role, you just need to have the desire to please him. You can peg your man and still be the bottom. The Top in the sexual relationship is driving the scenario, and he can request that you do certain things to please him – even though those things are of a more dominant nature. Pegging is extremely empowering. I have a feeling that you will come out of it feeling like you could run a marathon and take on the world.

Since you are no foreigner to butt play and have experimented with fingers and prostate toys, you know the importance of LUBE (Don’t you love how I always emphasize LUBE?). Graduating to pegging will be a natural process for you. The best way to start is by purchasing the correct harness and dildo. There are even harnesses with vibrating pouches so you won’t be left out. You’ll want to start with one that is smooth and small to get him used to the sensation. As he does, you can then upgrade to dildos with ridges, prostate stimulators, etc. I’ll suggest some fun things to try.

As for positioning, the best way to start it to put him on his hands and knees. If you are not tall enough to have proper leverage to enter him, either use a sex wedge or put a pillow under your knees. You’ll need to get used to the thrusting motion. Take a breather when you need to – it gets tiring. You’ll have a newfound respect for your man the next time he is relentlessly pounding your lady parts. You can also try putting him on his back and prop up his hips on a pillow or wedge. You will be able to hold onto his legs for leverage.

Since you are no stranger to the joys of prostate stimulation, you will not be surprised that even though he may start out with an erection, he will go soft as you are fucking him. Don’t panic. This is very normal. Over-stimulation of the prostate and deep penetration can be overwhelming. It does NOT mean that he is not enjoying it. Quite the opposite.

Now let’s talk about the proper gear for pegging:

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About Dear Mistress

Do you have a question for our resident Mistress?

She’s experienced in all things BDSM, power exchange, and general knowledge of anything outside of traditional vanilla relationships. With over 25 years in the lifestyle behind her, she continues to live what she preaches and she’s sharing what she knows with us.

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About The Author
Angie
Hi. My name is Angie, and I’m a social-media-and-smut-book-reading addict. Hi…Angie… I’ve been working hard on the magical internet since 2006 when I retired from teaching elementary school to stay at home with my two baby girls. Now, I am a smut peddler. You can follow my nonsense on Twitter and Facebook. Simply, I’m just a girl, looking at the book world, asking it to love her.