Recommended by Angela

Wow, what a powerful book. I was blown away the first time I read Ella Fields, and this book left me in awe as well. Toby’s a football player who deals with the hardships of mental illness and struggles within his own mind. The book was spot on with the realness of anxiety and the fear that comes with it. Pippa has watched her dad struggle with mental health problems and she finds herself drawn to Toby, needing to help. I loved her need to make it all better. I related in so many ways. This story is hard to read at times because it is very deep and very real but I promise, it will leave you so emotionally satisfied.

Where To Buy

About This Book

Heat Rating


Favorite Quotes

You know my soul, and I know yours. There’s no coming back from that. There’s no removing you from me.

Kissing Toby felt like more than kissing. It felt like I was being burned, slowly incinerated until I thought I’d burst.

I want to be with you always. I want to crawl underneath your skin, live inside the life that runs through your every vein, and consume your every thought. I want you to breathe me, to inhale the thoughts of me, and for you to exhale anything that stops me from overtaking every part of you. I want...To do to you exactly what you've done to me.

Publisher's Synopsis

From bestselling author Ella Fields comes an all new standalone. An emotional new adult romance that proves love is worth fighting your demons for.

Toby Hawthorne was an enigma.
One I didn’t factor into my college plans.

I wasn’t looking for love.
I wasn’t not looking for it either.
And in that state of in-between, he found me.

Unaware of the battle he fought everyday, I fell fast.
By the time I found out, it was too late.
Because I wanted everything.
Every broken, lost part of him.

I knew I couldn’t fix him.
I could only love him.
But I should’ve known better than to think that was enough.


I read. I create. I get in trouble. That is me in a nutshell. I live in a snarky, artistic, eclectic world where BDSM and Dark Erotica are high on my reading list. I yearn for a really raw, gritty book where the lead guy/girl is more like a villain and I am left completely mindf*cked. The more the usual lines of morality are blurred, the better. I am an Alice in Wonderland Freak, an Edgar Allan Poe lover and an ocean addicted mermaid. I like originality when it comes to my books. The dirtier, the better. I am here to Discover, Share and Obsess. Join me, will you?

Scroll to Top