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Alice-mother-loving-Clayton! You ol’ so-and-so! How the hell are ya?
Welcome! Thank you so much for talking with me today!
Though The Unidentified Redhead was released first, I think my introductory course into all things Alice Clayton was Wallbanger. Mother cuss, I was hooked. It was like… reading my inner monologue. Or hanging out with my best friend. I genuinely laughed. Not just an amused-snort-smirk, laugh-on-the-inside, but full on belly laughing.
”The British are coming! The British are coming!”
You, my dear, are one of my all time favorites. You do comedic erotica like… like someone who does comedic erotica really well. I have so much fun reading your books. I know you started off writing FanFic, and grew from there, so what made you decide to pick up a pen (laptop) and start writing?
This is seriously the coolest interview I’ve ever done. And bravo to you with all the pictures and the gifs, they’re fantastic. I may have watched the one with the cat more than a few times.
As for what made me start writing, it was something very specific. And that something very specific was Robert Pattinson. Yep. 100% RPAtz. The original inspiration for what became Jack Hamilton, he’s just to dreamy for words. Except I came up with a few words, and they’re all words like FUCK and HOT and NOW. So thanks Rob, thanks for the inspiration.
”He was wooing me. And I was letting him woo. I wanted the woo. I deserved the woo. I needed the wow that would surely follow the woo, but for now, the woo? It was whoa.”
You write such incredibly lovable characters. You want to be friends with the whole cast. The women are always smart, and feminine, and sassy, and strong. The men are charming and masculine, and sexy and adorable. Their relationships have a sort of a Lucy and Ricky vibe to them. What or who inspires these characters?
The characters sometimes are inspired by real life people, people that I know personally. Especially my Redhead cast. Holly is based on my real life bestie (and narrator for the Redhead audiobooks Keili Lefkovitz) and the character of Michael is based on someone I went to college with. Because everyone has a Michael, right?
The Wallbanger cast is based more loosely on friends of mine throughout the years, although the character of Jillian is based very literally on a blend of two of my real life mentors.
And her house? With the Hillevator? REAL!
Simon is the dream.
”Simon does commando. God bless America.”
And then there are character like Clive, the anthropomorphic Cat. Please tell me about Clive. Is there a real Clive?
Clive is the scene stealer for sure! And yes, Clive is based on my real life cat Bailey, who we sadly lost at 21 years. She was the best. And a total shit disturber, a la Clive. 😉
Before becoming a writer, you had a career as a makeup artist, esthetician and educator for a cosmetics company. Also, you were very active in the theater. How much of yourself is in the stories you write?
Oh Christ, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t draw from my own life when I write these books. The thing is, some of it is drawn straight from real life, some of it is inspired by, some of it are things I could only dream of. The theater is real, and something I’d very much like to get back to one day.
Can we just… hang out? Go get some coffee together? Laugh and be pervy and stuff?
Yes. Yes. Yes and yes.
”Twenty-four-year-olds were my new favorite thing. I needed to tell Oprah to put them on her list.”
What is your favorite thing to read, and what is your favorite thing to write?
I love reading paranormal romance. I love writing meet-cutes.
Editor’s Note (because I didn’t know and had to ask): A meet-cute is when the main characters meet for the first time.
From FanFic to Simon & Schuster. How much did you freak out over all of us freaking out over you? Did you ever anticipate the success that has come your way?
Oh hell no. This is the best thing that could have ever happened, no one could have imagined this. But I will say that the one thing I’ve learned from all of this is to trust your voice. No one can tell your story better than you can.
What does a day in the life of Alice Clayton look like? I’m imagining vintage A-Line dresses, cupcakes, adorable klutziness, and sexual shenanigans. Oh, and martinis. I may be taking some artistic liberties here…
Picture Christie Brinkley crossed with Sharon Stone crossed with Pamela Anderson crossed with Blake Lively crossed with Dame Edna.
Mostly I look like Edna…
What’s NEXT?! Rusty Nailed is set to release in June, (dance partyyyyy!) Can you tell us a bit about it?
I am seriously so nervous AND so excited for you guys to all read RUSTY NAILED. I really never planned to write a sequel, but then everyone wanted to know what happened to them. And frankly, so did I. 🙂
Okay. Rapid Fire Round! READYSETGO!
Sexiest man ever, sexiest woman ever?
Man — Robert Pattinson has been my go-to for several years now and I don’t see anyone taking that away.
Woman — Elizabeth Taylor
Obnoxious spoiled children.
Singing. Not so hidden if you ever get me within two feet of a microphone.
Bloody Mary — no horseradish, lots of olives
What scares the bejeezus out of you?
Basements. Because come on, it’s a basement.
Oldest thing in your refrigerator?
My grandmother’s engagement ring.
Favorite book (other than your own)?
Favorite song(s) on your iPod?
A picture of yourself right now?
Right now I’m picturing myself with RPatz.
Alice, thank you so very much for talking with me today. You are my favorite funny gal, and honest to God, I would read your shopping list. Looking forward to Rusty Nailed! Cheers!
About Kyleigh Jane
I suppose I was introduced to romance at an early age. When I was around 10 years old, I happened upon a highlighted and dog eared copy of “The Joy Of Sex” on my mother’s bookshelf. I was shocked. I was fascinated. Maybe it was the 1970s power muffs, maybe it was the mustaches, maybe it was phrases such as “tongue bath”, who knows. A couple of years later it was V.C. Andrews “Flowers In The Attic,” which upon discovery, my mom took away from me. From there I chugged along reading Danielle Steel novels, until one day, a little book called “Fifty Shades Of Grey” came along. It was a sirens call. It was everything I never knew I wanted. I was hooked. My love of reading romance blossomed into a new love for erotica, and I haven’t stopped reading since. I have a love for stories with grit, and substance, and meat on their bones. The dark stories, the format breakers, the unusual. I’m always searching for that next great read.